Today is Jesse's 59th B-DAY- you should call him and wish him a happy one. As tribute to said Dad, here are my favorite memories.
5. Going on an Alaskan cruise, he only brought $11.
4. When I colored my hair dark, and he called me ugly.
3. When he got cancer and didn't die.
2. When he got cancer and didn't die, again.
1. And of course......the day he lost a car.
J. (calls me on the phone) "Kristen, have you seen the brown Malibu"
K. "No, remember how I live in Utah and don't drive your cars"
J. "Are you sure you don't have it?"
K. "Positive"
J. "Have you seen it lately though?"
K. "I still live in Utah"
J. ........silent........hangs up on me
*2 DAYS LATER*
Still can't find the car, so he decides to report it stolen. (mind you it has been about 3 weeks since he first noticed it gone) Calls the police department, reports stolen car.
*MONTHS LATER*
Police department calls back, says they can't find it- nor have they heard anything. They advise to turn it over to the insurance company
*DAYS LATER*
Insurance company calls him. They have taken the claim on, and have settled. They give him blue-book value of the car. (Which, as its main driver I know best that it was not worth half that)
*DAYS LATER*
Idaho Falls Airport Security calls my dad. "Mr. Byram, are you going to be coming to get your car?"
*MINUTES LATER*
Jess remembers, "Self- remember that once when I flew to Canada to see Erika and Debbie, but I only had a one way ticket- so I drove back to Idaho in the suburban with my wife?"
You will be pleased to know that the insurance not only let him keep the check, but also paid the $1500 to get the car out of short term parking.
HAPPY BDAY DAD!
11 comments:
Josh and I just giggled over this posting. Good job well done!! We loved the $11 he brought on the cruise. And I remember vividly hearing the car story. Thanks for refreashing my memory. That is a great story. Remember the time we went walking around Rigby Lake and he needed your car keys and you threw them to him but you threw them so high they got caught in the tree? Ya, that was awesome. Your poor patient dad. I still giggle thinking of that day.
I particularly like his page-boy dorthy hamilish haircut on his wedding announcement. or when he proposed to your mom and called her the wrong name...or that time erika put laxatives in his food...
or everytime that stand up for cancer commercial comes and and he says, "im not standing up for that, cancers a bitch." wait maybe thats just what he wants to say
i remember hearing that car story-- and i think i laughed just as hard reading it again-- man jess--- he's funny...
Kristen... okay so you are officially one of the best bloggers I know!!!!! This was hilarious... of course I am at work and should not be looking at this right now and even though I shouldn't have laughed outloud to give my blog checking away... i did.
I am pretty good with the celeb apprentice. I can actually watch it online. So I will be good. But can I say that I have been thinking of those cookies everyday just dying to have more? Can you attend to my desire and lend me the recipe????? PLEASE I am begging you!
this is the best - way to post about the cutest dad ever. we love u jess... now if he would just read this blog.
You are so like your Dad--LOVED the car story. Definitely a keeper. I'm honored to share my birthday with the infamous Jess--Happy Birthday to us!
Oh your dad is the best!! And always good for providing us with a good laugh! I love it!
nice trib to jess. don't even think that it moves you up into the fav slot!
Hi its me again. Spoke to your mom last night and I was lying in bed thinking like I always do and then it dawned on me that I didn't wish your dad happy birthday when I was talking to Debbie. What a bad friend I am to your dad. Give him my best.
that's a pretty good story, I thought the one of my dad stealing a car in a mall parking lot was good but I think this might beat it!!( rental car and the key fit in the wrong car,same model and color-my dad didn't notice until he tried to valet park 100 miles away)
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